I am of course referring to the big differences between me and the movie star Scarlett Johansson (of course the rest is similar hehe). For those who don’t know she stars in the movie Lost in Translation which is exactly how I have felt today at my 1st official day at the Shenzhen office! So the level of English speaking locals is about 60% less in SZ and I found communicating really hard, Im going to have to learn Mandarin fast or else really hope that my hand gesture / drawing skills technique will suffice! I had my first true moment of ‘omg, what have I done?!!’ While Im still on the subject of work, might I just mention the arctic air con conditions… I know its warm outside but I think temperatures of less than 10C in the bathroom is a teeny bit excessive!!

Well I have had a thoroughly bizarre and extremely strange day, lets start at the beginning shall we?!,,, Well once I have passed Immigration I have to meet the company shuttle bus, but due to this weeks public holiday I discovered that no cars/vans are allowed on the top floors of the immigration building carpark during this weeks national holidays for China (really quite unsure why!!)… this was where I was supposed to meet the bus! Had to stomp around the corner to eventually find it in the most crazy weather. I have been told that by now the weather should resemble autumn, ie cooler and calm. The problem is we are apparently still in the throes of summer deluxe… SO hot, windy as hell and plenty of crazy rain showers! Im thinking that whatever summer the UK was supposed to have has been stolen by the eastern shores!

For lunch we went to a Japanese restaurant in my work building, gorgeous with lots of cherry blossom etc, and Im thinking wow this will be a pleasant dining experience… until we were given menus. Everyone Asian at my table received the regular menu (in Chinese) containing all the dishes in the special offer set menu prices… I however was handed a ‘special’ menu for English readers. Now, I mean special as in retarded, not special as in precious or rare! It was HUGE… honestly like bigger than A3!! AND,,, the set menu prices were nowhere to be seen and all the dishes were averaging at about $150 (instead of the Chinese version of $30!!). What a cheek! Soon managed to get it sorted but has given me an insight of how likely I am to get ripped off without locals to take me out… might employ a personal aide!

I had a delicious lunch of Tempura king prawns, a bowl of giant noodles, and some ginger rice samosas! Yummy, afterwards we had some complimentary fruit and tea… English style but not quite the same, it was thick, sweet, and with lots of cream! After we had paid, we got up to leave only to be chased when they explained they had given us a 30% discount but they had made a mistake and could they have it back?! Um.. no you got it wrong and all our dinners came out at completely separate times (which enraged me but is not so much of a big deal in Asia apparently)!!

After work I had quite a commute back to the hotel and was looking forward to buying my 1st non instant noodle dinner since I got here now that I have a can opener. On the menu… cream of pumpkin soup! When I got to the hotel shop to buy it (along with some ludicrously expensive bread!) I realised that a bloke from the bus was standing next to me peering into my basket… and then starts questioning me on why British people like sandwiches so much?!! Im standing there thinking ok, polite small talk I can indulge that for 5mins even though Im tired and hungry and desperate for a shower! But THEN.. he turns round and tells me that he doesn’t really want to talk about bread but instead he had seen me around the hotel and did I want to go for a drink??… Im thinking that considering he is twice my age and hasn’t even got that older man charm about him, he must have been living in the hotel for faaaar too long! Politely made my excuses… then he left, he didn’t even carry on the pretence of shopping.. what a strange man!

Made it back to my room eagerly awaiting my pumpkin soup… then when I opened it, it came out a one giant jelly lump instead of the alluring creamy liquid I was expecting… it looked completely gross! Chucked that and settled for a peanut butter sandwich instead. Followed it up with what looked like a Bueno bar, but it turned out to be a cheap imitation… what a let down!

Now I’ve had a shower and sat down to write this it is bedtime pretty much, I think I shall write the day off as a complete disaster and start afresh tomorrow!

Hope my disastrous day has somewhat lightened yours! I miss you all more than ever today and wish so much I had someone here to chat to about my day instead of writing it down on my laptop like a LOSER!! Haha…

Update me soon,
Tx