is all i have to say about that....

Mmm a breakfast bucket of bats...

you DESERVE a parking ticket

Or... NOT

Yours for the bargain price of £100 each... stuffed ugly dogs.. in a suitcase!!!

Mmmm Dried crocodile feet
nom nom nom

Last night I narrowly escaped the cruel clutches of a conniving cockroach, intent on making a nest for its baby eggs in my inner ear canal, which would in time hatch and bury a tunnel into my BRAIN which would then rupture in an atomic bomb of ugly ass cockroach infants and grey matter !!!

Let me share my terrifying tale...

I was snuggled up in bed with the man, freshly laundered sheets, fan blowing a cool gentle breeze across the room, on the pleasantly dizzy cusp of dreamland about to be whisked off by the sleep fairies for a magical twilight adventure....

WHEN CAPT COCKROACH MADE HIS DEADLY SHOCK N AWE ATTACK

Cunningly disguised at first as a small hair tickle, my sleepy slumber state was soon replaced by HIGH ALERT after it fast became apparant that something alien was charging for the sacred earhole!!!

Luckily the man is semi growing a beard and is therefore hard core - like rambo - and leaped upon the scary beast with his bare hands, blocking the statanic bugs route of retreat and capturing it in a small transparent prison cell. (my hero) for we shall not leap the depths of its kind, and shall spare its insect life as an example to others....





Bluuuughghhh!

MmMmmmm... squid ink buns for breakfast

Oh yeah reduced and readily available for you... taking orders for those interested:

Suffering with HK cabin fever, and on a mission to save necessary cash to pay the taxman (annual bill about to hit waahhh), we decided to go hiking and camping taking advantage of the last long weekend in a while.



Naturally it decided to rain all weekend (with brilliant sunshine this morning on the way to work -typical) and I discovered that tropical thunderstorms above your head whilst curled up in a tiny tent on the beach are quite terrifying!!

Despite the rain the views as ever were breath taking, and I felt blessed to be able to live in a country with such a beautiful and challenging landscape.



SO DONT SPOIL IT HK... look at this DISGUSTING RUBBISH!!!!



Stupid campers, and thoughtless boats who dont dispose of their garbage correctly spoil it for everyone. Our usual favourite beach spot, Tai wan, was disgustingly filthy and we were forced to move on to another along the coast :(

The upside of this was that our 2nd destination, Sai Wan was gorgeous, deserted - us being the only nutters prepared to camp in the continuous rain- and clean!
There was a tiny noodle shack there providing yummy food, beer, shelter, and mossie spray (abundant and persistant little feckers). The owner there, Thomas, had lived in Bournemouth for 2 years!! Small world!

Feeling much better after some fresh air, exercise and quiet time :)

OMG... its what Ive been looking for for over 2years... I knew Id find one eventually...
A CROCODILE SPECIALIST STORE for all your crocodile needs (wtf?!)

Guessing someone is hungry...

I just got back from my first ever trip to Bangkok. It was surprisingly relaxed considering I was only there for a day and a half. The traffic in Bkk is horrendous and getting anywhere by car takes forever. We decided, induced by our excessive party behaviour in Honkers, to hire a driver to take us out of the city and into the neighbouring province to sight see and shizzle. (although to be fair we didnt realise that the drive was going to take 2 hours and there was a hairy moment where I thought we might possibly be being driven into Black Market Kidney town). Here's basically my my trip in pictures for all you blog devotees.
Miss you
x

The floating markets in the canals of the neighboring province:






That's me sat on an elephant!!! As you do on a Saturday afternoon...






A visit to the 'Reclining Buddah' temple. We got told off for being 'too sexy' (uncovered shoulders) and there was an entire wall of pots where you deposit one coin into each as you walk the length of the temple and as you do you make a wish or say thanks for something you are grateful for.







Crazy ass flooding when it POURED down mid afternoon!


Freaky animal shows (I didnt go see any of these by the way):



Rounding of the sun soaked day - Enjoying cocktails on the rooftop of Bangkok's tallest building: Vertigo bar on the 59th floor... where drinks are made of gold (a glass of HOUSE red was nearly 10 golden pounds!)

It's a one-of-a-kind dining experience at MODERN TOILET, an Asian restaurant chain !
TAIPEI, Taiwan(UPI) - A popular Taiwanese restaurant chain that is expanding into China features toilets for seats and a bodily-waste themed menu.

Modern Toilet, which has seven locations in Taiwan, one in Hong Kong and a location opening this week in Shenzhen, China, is decorated with lights and dish covers shaped like feces and seats customers at glass tables with sinks underneath.

The eatery's food is served atop miniature toilet bowls, ice cream dishes are shaped like squat toilets and beverages are served in plastic urinals that customers can take home as souvenirs.

The desert menu features shaved ice concoctions with names such as "diarrhea with dried droppings," or chocolate; "bloody poop," or strawberry; and "green dysentery," or kiwi.

"It's supposed to shock and confuse the senses," Chen Min-kuang, manager of a Taiwan Modern Toilet, said of the scatological theme.

Whilst swimming in the sea at Deep Water Bay last weekend I witnessed the most bizarre thing.
A little fish swam right up to us and even allowed SnT to scoop it up in his hands for a closer look.
It was then we realised... IT HAD NO EYES.
Spooky


Back on the beach the a stench in the air of rotting fish prompted an investigation which revealed a whole load of washed up dead EYELESS fish !!


We were informed that the run off pipe further down the beach after the recent typhoon, had most probably flushed a load of fresh water - including fresh water fish - into the sea, which explained their death but not their state of eyelessness.
One recent proposal from the Leisure and cultural services dept was that birds have eaten them - um fussy eyeball orientated birds delicately plucking the eyes from tiny fresh water fish?? I think not.
The search continues.

Maybe its a early Halloween prank and sea creatures along the shore are sniggering at the confused gweilos??

So remember a while back there was the gecko that had been unfortunately spiliced by out front door??
Well... also found this poor little fella deceased under a pile of my dirty laundry :(